If you have a reactive dog, you’ve probably asked yourself some version of this question:
“What did I do wrong?”
Maybe your dog barks, lunges at other dogs, loses her mind when someone comes to the door, and reacts to people, bicycles, cars, trucks or seemingly nothing at all.
And if you’re like most owners of reactive dogs, you’ve probably spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to fix it.
You’ve hired two, three, even four trainers, watched hundreds of hours of YouTube videos, done more socialization and obedience classes, and still your dog is reactive.
So you start blaming yourself.
Stop.
You are probably looking at this problem from the wrong end.
Your dog’s behavior is not the whole story. It is the result of a whole bunch of things happening underneath. Behavior is a symptom of other issues.
And once you understand that, you may finally have a few of those “Ohhhh…” moments that change the way you see your dog.
Why Is Everyone Blaming You?
Let’s start with something that makes me angry.
The blame game needs to stop.
Everyone has told you to either socialize more, or you didn’t socialize enough, and I do mean everyone—veterinarians, family, friends, and complete strangers.
A stranger on the sidewalk sees your dog barking and yells, “You haven’t socialized that dog enough!”
And, unfortunately, some trainers make you feel like you’re the problem, too.
You didn’t train enough, socialize enough, establish yourself as the leader, and you spoiled your dog.
No wonder you feel like a failure.
But here’s what I want you to understand:
You can do everything you were told to do and still end up with a dog reactive to many things.
That’s because reactive behavior isn’t created by one person.
There isn’t a single “reactive dog button” that someone pushed.
Your dog’s behavior is the result of the many things.
And we need to look at the whole dog.
Your Dog Came With Genetics
This is one of the biggest pieces people overlook.
Your dog didn’t arrive in your home as a blank slate.
Genetics matter.
And I’m not just talking about breed.
I’m talking about the genetics that influence temperament, arousal, sensitivity, confidence, fear, anxiety, persistence, prey drive, guarding behavior, herding behavio,r and the ability to recover from stress.
Think about what your dog was originally bred to do.
Retrieve.
Hunt.
Guard.
Herd.
Protect.
Patrol.
Chase.
Flush.
Dig.
Work independently, hello herding dogs!
Some dogs were specifically bred to notice things humans don’t notice and react to them.
Then we bring that dog into a modern human environment and expect her to simply ignore everything her genetics are telling her to notice.
Here’s a light-bulb moment.
Imagine a purebred Labrador Retriever from hunting stock.
Her breeders selected dogs specifically to excel in AKC hunt trials and to work with duck and pheasant hunters.
But this particular dog now lives in a suburban home with three young children.
Nobody hunts.
Nobody gives her a job.
She’s rarely taken for a meaningful walk.
She’s chewing furniture.
Stealing socks and mittens.
Chasing the children.
The family says, “We need a trainer; she has behavior issues.”
Maybe.
But what if this is “bad” behavior?
What if she’s under-employed?
What if her brain and body are screaming for the work she was genetically designed to do? Scent pheasants, retrieve them, swim to the ducks and retrieve them. Labradors were meant to spend time in fields, woods and even water. They are not designed to stay home all day and do nothing.
The conflict is between the environment the dog is living in: a home, no backyard, and not enough genetic outlets.
Your Dog’s Genetics Can Include Fear, Too
Here’s another piece that gets missed.
Genetics aren’t only about what a dog was bred to do.
They can also influence how a dog experiences the world.
Some dogs are naturally more cautious, environmentally sensitive, and recover from startling experiences quickly.
Others don’t.
Some are naturally suspicious of strangers.
Some are more sensitive to movement, sound, touch, or changes in their environment.
And then there are dogs whose genetic tendencies are combined with a completely different environment than the one their ancestors were selected to live in.
Consider a small Serbian street dog.
Imagine she comes from generations of dogs who survived by guarding territory, hunting vermin, and making decisions independently.
She’s cautious with unfamiliar people.
She takes a long time to warm up to a dog entering her territory.
Now put that dog in a middle-aged woman’s condo.
No yard, acreage, territory to patrol, vermin to hunt, autonomy.
She gets walked regularly. Her owner loves her. Her owner is doing everything she can.
But every time another dog appears, she explodes.
She barks inside.
She can’t tolerate being crated.
Her owner is embarrassed and frustrated.
“Why is my dog so reactive?”
Maybe the better question is:
“How much conflict exists between this dog’s genetics and the environment in which she’s expected to live?”
That doesn’t mean the owner did anything wrong.
It means we have more information to work with.
Then There Are Past Experiences
Genetics are only one piece.
Your dog’s experiences matter, too.
And here’s where things get really important:
Your dog’s experience is not necessarily the same as your experience.
You may say:
“Nothing happened to her!”
But your dog may have a very different story.
Maybe another dog rushed her, cornered or simply overwhelmed by other dogs at the dog park or even doggie daycare.
She might have been startled by a well-meaning stranger, but a stranger nonetheless
Children might have been allowed to climb on her causing her to feel scared and not safe.
Maybe she spent hours in a chaotic environment with no way to escape.
And sometimes we simply don’t know.
This is especially true with rescue dogs.
You don’t need to know exactly what happened to understand that something may have happened.
And Then There’s Doggy Daycare
This is one of the things that gets me into trouble.
I’m going to say it anyway.
Poorly run, overcrowded doggie daycare is one of the most overlooked contributors to reactive behavior.
Not every daycare and not every dog. Just like people, some dogs are more resilient than others.
Doggie daycare relieves owners’ guilt of leaving their dog home all day.
Your dog comes home exhausted.
You think:
“Perfect! She had a great day. She played with dogs all day, and now she’s tired.”
But “What kind of tired?”
Did she spend the day running through fields, woods, swimming, exploring new scents and sleeping in the sun when she wanted to?
Was she able to move away when another when she needed private time?
Or was she inside a room with 10, 20 or 30 other dogs, constant movement, noise, social pressure and nowhere to escape?
Dogs have a personal space bubble of 7–10 feet, although the actual distance varies tremendously from dog to dog and situation to situation.
Now imagine trying to navigate a room where that bubble is constantly being invaded.
For hours.
Every day.
You’d be exhausted, too.
And exhausted doesn’t necessarily mean happy.
Sometimes it means overwhelmed.
I’ve written much more about this in Problems with Doggie Day Care, including why so many of my reactive-dog clients were essentially daycare dropouts.
Your Environment Can Create Conflict
Here’s another light-bulb moment.
Sometimes the problem isn’t your dog.
It’s the mismatch between your dog’s needs and her environment.
A dog genetically wired to patrol a large territory may struggle in a condo.
A working-bred dog may struggle with a life consisting of three 15-minute potty walks.
A highly sensitive dog may struggle in a busy urban environment.
And then we say:
“Why is my dog reactive?”
Because she’s telling you something.
She may be feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, frightened, or even chronically stressed.
Most dogs are living a captive life with little to no autonomy or agency. And the reality is most of our dog were NOT bred to be pet dogs. They still carry the genetics to do a job that is no longer required.
This is where the behavior problems develop.
The Barking Isn’t the Problem
This is where I want you to stop looking at the behavior and start looking underneath it.
Barking.
Lunging.
Growling.
Spinning.
Snapping.
Chasing.
These behaviors, the ones you can see and are frustrating, are symptoms of an underlying issue or issues.
In my work with reactive dogs, I use the Emotional Dysregulation Cycle to explain one of the biggest pieces of the puzzle.
When a dog’s nervous system is overwhelmed, the dog can become stuck in a fight-or-flight state. Once that happens, asking her to calmly respond to your cue may be like asking someone to solve a math problem while they’re running from a charging Grizzly Bear.
That’s why more obedience doesn’t necessarily solve reactivity.
And it’s why simply exposing your dog to more triggers can make things worse.
I’ve written more about this in Why Won’t My Dog Stop Barking?, where I explain why barking, lunging and growling are often symptoms of a much bigger problem.
So What Actually Causes a Reactive Dog?
Usually, it’s not one thing.
That’s the point.
We need to look at:
Genetics.
Not only must we consider what our dogs were bred to do, hunt, guard, herd, etc., but personality traits are also inherited, such as fear and anxiety, low confidence, all which play an integral role in how your dog views the world and reacts to it.
Past experiences and trauma.
What has happened to her? What has she experienced from her perspective?
Environment.
Does the life she’s living actually meet her needs?
Health.
Pain, illness, hormonal changes and other physical problems can affect behavior and should never be ignored.
Emotional regulation.
How often is your dog’s nervous system being pushed into overdrive? And does she have enough opportunity to regulate once again?
And then there is you.
Not because you caused this.
Because you’re the person who can help.
You Didn’t Break Your Dog
This is the part I really want you to remember.
You didn’t cause your dog’s reactive behavior simply because you didn’t socialize enough. The fact of the matter is that you probably did a fabulous job socializing her.
Of course you made mistakes, we all do, however, I can assure you that those errors did not cause your dog to become dog reactive.
Remember, behavior is a symptom of an underlying issue/s.
Before you can stop the dog reactive behavior, you need to understand its motivation, them support your dog and help her feel safe.
Stop Asking “How Do I Fix My Reactive Dog?”
Start asking:
What was she bred to do and am I doing enough to fill her genetic cup?
Does my dog feel safe inside, on walks, in the car, and in the backyard?
Is her environment compatible with her breed genetics? How can I improve them?
Am I willing to agree and understand that my dog is living as a captive animal? How can I give her more autonomy?
And perhaps most importantly:
What can I change so my dog doesn’t have to work so hard just to get through her day?
That’s where the real work begins.
Blaming yourself is pointless because you are not to blame; no one is. More socialization only serves to keep her stuck in an Emotional Dysregulation Cycle and Trigger Stacked.
With understanding.
Because your dog isn’t broken.
And neither are you.
If you want to understand the signals your dog is giving you before the barking, lunging or growling starts, read Your Dog Is Talking, Are You Listening?.
And if you’d rather watch than read, come over to my Everything Dog YouTube channel.
I’ve spent more than 30 years helping people understand the dogs they live with—not just trying to make their behavior disappear.
Understanding your dog changes everything.
